Scam Bake

by Bill Dunn


As we all know, we have been getting raped at the gas pumps for the last couple of years. The little game of baiting us with a slight decrease in price only to raise it back up to twice the amount is beyond old, it is infuriating.

Not only is the game infuriating, so is the way that people as a whole seem to take it in stride and not raise their voices in righteous indignation at the abuse and force our government and the oil companies to do something about it. It could be the helpless feeling that we have no hope in fighting city hall. Maybe it is the ever-growing apathy blanketing our day-to-day lives. We just take the beating and lick our wounds and think, well what can I do about it?

The drug companies are another frequent abuser of the American public and one that is transparent in their abuse. They are openly selling drugs to neighboring countries at a significantly reduced price. You can cross the borders to the North or South and buy the same drugs for far less.

So what do the pharmaceutically dependent people here in the USA do instead of attacking the beast that is oppressing them? Why they put together bus tours to go across the border to make drug runs. It may be a short-term solution to the problem, but it is, at the very least, a hassle and one that shouldn’t even exist. If those same people redirected their energies into letter writing and lobbying their elected officials maybe, just maybe, things would change.

The majority of people nowadays are more interested in whether or not Britney Spears’ baby is properly secured in a car seat or what Bradgelina’s baby looks like than about the things that are sucking the money out of their wallets. The only time they feel compelled to pick up a pen and paper to voice their displeasure is over the small stuff.

Perhaps I am setting my sights too high, the oil and drug companies are massive. Maybe we should start with some smaller fish in the tank of sharks. The ones who always have their hands in your pocket looking to take every penny they can find.

The world of retail has truly morphed into a river of piranhas wanting to rip the flesh from your bones at every turn. They have more gimmicks designed to separate you from your money than any other industry out there. Sure they have put a lot of time into their confusing little deceptions, but that still doesn’t make it right.

Let’s start with the grocery stores shall we? All of the major chain grocery stores have a “store” or “rewards” card, or as my editor likes to call them, “the screwed if you don’t have them” cards, which unfortunately is the truth. If you don’t have one of these bad boys you will be paying full price on everything you buy. The card is free to get, but they are pointless. Well pointless to everyone except to the store that provides them which uses them as a tracking device to see what you buy.

I’m sure in their minds they think that they are giving us a deal by giving us a discount on the over bloated prices they throw at us. Use our card, let us track your buying habits, and we will knock a little off the price. 

To them I have a suggestion, why not lose the card, drop the prices, and let everyone get your best price instead of tracking us like a captured bear cub being released back into the wild?

The other pain in the ass that works hand in hand with the store card is a coupon. To those of us who try to get the best deal possible, coupons have become a necessary evil. Without them you will be paying way too much on many everyday products and it shouldn’t be that way.

So to those manufacturers who rely on coupons to sell their products, stop it. Just drop the price to what it should cost so the stores can pass on those savings to us. That will save us, the consumer, from having to cut those little bastards, drag them to the store, and subsequently cause delays in the lines while the checker scans them. If it really costs a dollar, sell it for a dollar. 

And how about the club stores like Sam’s and Costco? Even though I am forced into doing it, I cringe every time I write that check for my membership fee. Even though my membership offers extras like insurance and discounts on things outside of the store, things that by the way I have never used, why should we be paying for the “privilege” of shopping at their store?

The first rule in sales is that the only favor that is being extended is by the customer who chooses to shop at your store. This is a fact that is apparently lost on the club stores. It is not enough that when you go there you have no other choice but to buy in bulk, 5lbs of cheese or enough laundry detergent to wash every uniform in the army, you also have to pay 40 bucks a year for that “privilege”.

But far and away the biggest scam is the one thrust upon us at stores like Best Buy and Circuit City. While they are not alone in this unsavory practice, many places that sell computer/electronic equipment do it as well, they are the ones who advertise it and exploit it the most.

I am of course referring to the dreaded rebates offered by stores with the support of manufacturers. Every Sunday when you open your newspaper you are treated to a stack of advertisements showing what appear to be phenomenal deals. A complete computer system for $399.00! What a deal! Then you notice the fine print with the evil words “after rebate”. It might as well read, “ Get read to jump through hoops, monkey boy”. Which is exactly what they make you do.

Rebates used to be easy, some still are when you are trying to get back five or ten bucks, but when you are talking about $50.00 to $300.00 or more, get ready to dance. They are going to want not only your original sales receipt, they are also going to want the UPC code off the box, rebate slip, your name, address, phone number, your first born child, and any other ridiculous thing they can think of to make the process as difficult as possible.

And difficulty is the key word here because they are hoping you will slip up or forget something in the process so they have a reason to deny your rebate. As a matter of fact, they are hoping you do that or forget to send it in altogether. The last thing they want to do is give you any of your money back.

What makes this whole exercise stink is the fact that when you go in to get your $399 computer you are actually paying them close to $1000. The store then puts the money into their bank account where it accumulates interest while you wait for your paper work to be processed and sent to you. So in reality you are floating the store a no interest loan for anywhere from 30 to 90 days depending on the company.

Again, all of you mentioned above, quit making our lives more difficult. If it costs 399 dollars, sell it to us at that price. Our day to day lives are hard enough to deal with, without you making us try to pry open the oyster in hopes of getting that pearl. Just sell it to us for what it’s worth and simplify all of our lives.

There, I have banged my gong. It may not be that loud, but at least I am trying the best way I know how.

Who’s going to be next?


Bill Dunn can be contacted at info@sgvweekly
Some of his previous articles can be found here.